Friday, December 30, 2011

A New Day

My husband works at The Inspiration Network. He's a television executive in charge of selecting programming to air, previewing it, researching what their audience wants and what is inspirational. This network used to air primarily religious programming -- preaching shows, teaching shows, Gospel music shows, that sort of thing. The shift toward entertainment programming that enriches is, I think, going to be a great one. There is so much trash tv available and so little that is inspiring. The "theme" of the shift in programming is "It's a New Day." I like that. It's invigorating to think that we can wake up one day and say, "Today is going to be different. Instead of ____________, I am going to _______________." We don't have to accept the way things are, the things life has thrown us that are unsavory, unappealing, or downright horrible. We can fall back and regroup. Or we can at least try to.

How would you fill in those blanks? Here's what I think...

Instead of suffering silently, I am going to call a friend and ask for help.
Instead of wishing I had a book published, I am going to finish the ones I have only partially completed and start submitting them to publishers.
Instead of worrying about money, I am going to trust God to provide for all of our needs.
Instead of judging people when they treat me poorly, I am going to pray for them.
Instead of sitting on the sidelines, I am going to get back in the game.

Yours, with trembling hands and fluttery heart, stumbling feet and blinded eyes,

Megan Elizabeth

Thursday, December 29, 2011

Back to the blog...

I took quite a long hiatus from blogging due to unforeseen personal circumstances that just made me change my priorities, circle the wagons, get back to basics and get over some pretty huge wounds inflicted by people who should have known better but somehow, inexplicably, didn't.

So I was thinking about what I'd like to say after a year away, and it occurred to me that the shift in my priorities ought to be the focus. So here's the thing. After being ripped off by unscrupulous remodelers, losing over $100,000 in the process, facing four kids' college tuition with no money and no retirement money, dealing with bitterness, loss of faith in God, and severe emotional pain that left me on the outside of an organization I thought I'd see through until the day I died, I came to the conclusion that we walk through this life alone -- not completely alone but nothing is secure here beyond our own personal walk with God and our own interactions with other human beings. I trusted the wrong people, probably through some inner fault of mine that kept me from holding them accountable because I was insecure and underconfident. The thing is, if God has given us free will, and He says He has, that means other people have free will, too, and their decisions affect our lives. But ultimately, God is there in the midst of it all.

Learning the hard lessons -- always the hard way, it seems -- has left me vulnerable in some areas and hardened in others. I tend not to trust people as easily now and when bad things happen I tend to mistrust God as well. The important lesson I learned is that God can take that. He knows our frailties, fears, and concerns. He knows the deepest longings of our hearts, and already knows how we're going to react. The truth is He loves us in spite of our sin and sent His son because of our frailties. It's comforting to know that He has our backs when we're wrongly accused and is ever present -- ready to comfort us.